Fall o u t
by SuicideMonday
Summary: Breaking up with someone is easy. Forgetting all the good times they spent together? Not so much.- Are you allowed to yearn for the very thing you ran away from? AU Gakuen-verse Yao/Ivan


AN: Wow, it's been awhile hasn't it? So much has happened in the past month or so! (Some good, some bad, I guess that's life) I think I'm following Doitsu by posting something that's unfinished. I wrote this while I should have been studying for finals and I absolutly hated how it turned out. But now that some time has passed I think I can stand it. It's not _that bad... _I think. Alot of unfinished fics lying around but my computer was…taken from me? (didn't have a computer for awhile) But! Doitsu has been very kind to lend me her old computer!

This is for the Rochu Squad DA contest using the theme Gakuen! It was gonna be a long oneshot but I'm splitting it up for my sanity. I promise that the next fic will be more original! XD (I fail at Gakuen ideas...)

* * *

**Fall o u t**

_I'm not sure how my heart feels about you_

"I think we should see other people."

The cliché phrase passed through his lips as easily as if he was commenting on the weather. Honestly, what else was he supposed to say? With those seven words, what was held for four months was broken; crushed before it ever had a chance to really form. All it took was a few seconds to change everything.

Yao looked at Ivan awkwardly, wishing that he would just say something. The tense atmosphere was a given, but this breakup was bound to happen eventually.

Ivan's shocked face and cracked reply of "What…?" said otherwise. His eyes were focused on Yao's, disbelief written all over his face.

Yao cringed, unable to stand the pain he was causing another. He was expecting a simple breakup; a few parting words, and possibly even some hopeful promises about the future of the other. He truly thought Ivan had seen this _coming._ They were a standard high school couple, doomed to break up after graduation. It was best to bring their story to a close now.

The tension in the air could break glass.

Unsettling silence fell between them.

Both waited for the other to speak, gathering up courage but losing thoughts as they formed. Yao stared at the darkening sky. It looked as if it was going to rain soon. He would rather be anywhere but here right now but his responsibility called for him to not run away.

Ivan parted his lips slowly, asking the question that was running through his head. He tried to find better words, but in the end it all came down to-

"Why?"

Why is it that we must always question actions? Must they always be justified? As Yao formed his answer in his mind, he realized that they would both miss their next class. He would have to think of an excuse to give to the teacher… His mind liked to play with multiple thoughts at the same time.

Anything to distract himself from this.

"We're heading in different directions Ivan."

Ah, that sounded a bit more condescending than he would like…

"Graduation is in two months…"

And honestly, he couldn't think of a good reason behind his actions.

_Could he really manage a long distance relationship?_

Yao never really understood it himself. Why _did _he start dating Ivan? The Russian had expressed an interest in him so when Ivan finally asked him out, he simply agreed. It was fun, watching movies and holding hands but-

Something was wrong.

Seeing Ivan's large smiles and trying to return them with his own left a queasy feeling in his stomach. After the initial high of the first two months, Yao was beginning to feel the strains in their relationship. The little things he could ignore at first, the pep in his voice that he had to fake. All the evidence was right in front of his face.

Could it be possible that he was the only one?

He couldn't stand the knots in his stomach any longer. In the back of his mind he was thinking of ways to end their relationship even though it just began. So when graduation rolled around, he jumped at the opportunity to be rid of his guilt once and for all. He hesitated, tried to see the problem from a different angle, but always came to the same conclusion.

He didn't _want_ to hurt Ivan, a small piece of him regretted the fact that he agreed to date him in the first place. It was a spur of the moment thing really. He didn't think he would feel so uncomfortable in relationship.

But that probably wasn't the best thing to tell Ivan.

Yao closed his eyes, realizing this would be harder than he expected.

"I'm sorry."

Ivan hesitated before he spoke, probably a thousand questions on the tip of his tongue.

"No, it's okay. I understand."

Guilt washed over Yao. It was obvious that Ivan was in far more pain than the discomfort he felt in his bones. And that made it all the worse. Ivan's head was turned, looking away, concealing any feelings that were in his eyes. Ivan was letting him walk away from this relatively undamaged.

He probably...really liked him.

Maybe even—

Would he allow himself to finish that thought?

Something was falling.

And here he was breaking Ivan's heart.

"I'll see you around…Yao."

Ivan gave Yao one last parting glance, before he back away from the grass where they stood, and turned the corner to walk away.

Why was it… so painful to see him walk away?

Rather than the knots in his stomach, something was tugging at his heart.

Yao's feet moved on impulse, chasing after Ivan as his brain still tried to figure out what he was trying to accomplish by _going after him._

_He _was the one that dumped Ivan.

What was he doing?

"Ivan! Wait, I-"

Yao skidded around the corner, looking for any sign or Ivan's silver blond hair or his light beige scarf. In those few moments, Ivan has disappeared, leaving Yao in a sea of students and Gakuen uniforms.

Yao looked to the floor, hearing the pitter patter of the rainfall hitting the school.

_Sometimes we don't realise-_

_The pain we inflict on others._

_o-o-o_

_What's left unsaid_

_Hurts the most._


End file.
